Opps

I’m Sorry

I just forgot them all ….
I’m So Sorry

I’m So Sorry

But then

That means you won’t have to remember any of them
and anyway
I’m sure
You think you know them all already
Because

We all think we know everything

And
That is one of the things that you should really know
That everyone
All the time
Thinks they know everything

PAUSE

Some other things you might need to know:

Like:

PAUSE

Oh never mind

I mean what good is knowledge without action and everybody’s too busy to act these days
(Walking down the street staring at their phones hoping the world will change while they text
their mother and check all their likes on instagram)

Don’t post this on instagram

PAUSE

Things you need to know

Like:
Life isn’t fair
and it will never be fair
Sooo
Get over it
cause
Then you die, cause everybody dies.

Therefore I was wrong
There is this one thing in life that is fair.
Death
Death is fair
Happens to everyone

Which means

in the some time
not
too distant future you will no longer exist,
you won’t be participating,
you won’t be here
you won’t be telling people what you’re sure you know
and so forth,
you’ll just be gone

So
if you’re going to die
in the not too distant future

PAUSE
PAUSE

So

Nobody

is thinking about you right now, not even
the person across the room who you are sure is
staring straight at you and down your blouse.
It’s not you he’s thinking about

Your Mom probably isn’t thinking of you right now either

(unless you’re texting her instead of listening to me)

You are the only person who thinks about you all the time. The only person.
The only person probably thinking about you yourself right now is you
Sorry that’s just it
I mean
think
or don’t bother
because
everything you need to know you think you already know

PAUSE

Other things you need to know

Like thinking you’re gonna hit the jackpot tomorrow

Well maybe day after tomorrow
BUT
You’re not going to
You’re just not

Except once I had a friend
who
who won the lottery
It just didn’t change his life much
See it never comes true

What I’m trying to say Is this:

Whatever your current plan is – it won’t work out

Try a new one
But that one won’t work out either
So that’s it
Just the way it is

PAUSE
PAUSE

It’s not under the rug
It’s not under the rug

There is nothing you need to know
Nothing you need to know

Because

The humane race is irrelevant
That means you’re irrelevant

And you’re gonna tell me you already know that?
So why are you
still acting like the biggest piece of shit in the middle of the whole damned universe
if you already know that

PAUSE
It’s not under the bed

There is nothing you need to know

The basic human condition is loneliness

You’re always wrong
especially when you’re sure your not

You should know your paying attention to the wrong things
and you won’t know that until its too late

PAUSE

If it isn’t under the rug or the bed maybe it’s behind the refrigerator.

PAUSE
PAUSE

As if
Not True
Want
Need
Never
Never ever

At all

You will never be able to know all the things you need to know.
You will never be able to understand all the things
you already know

And what you think is so important now
won’t be in 5 years (5 mins)
5 5 5
of course in 5 years who knows if you’ll still be alive

do you keep knowing things once you’re dead?

PAUSE

There are no facts of life

Illusion, faith, fear

There’s always that one lucky
Guess
Sometime Somewhere
that works out

I know things you need to know

PAUSE

Mars is Red
The moon is orange
The sky is blue

But not you

Repeat after me
Things never change they just appear to

PAUSE

Repeat after me

PAUSE
PAUSE

If it’s not behind the refrigerator
maybe you put it
in the refrigerator……or in the freezer.
Maybe it got in the laundry by mistake

And so
you think if
you know
just enough of the right stuff
you can be immortal
and then you’ll live while everyone else dies

You’ll never find it
You keep looking in the same places. It’s just not there

Did you look in the bushes?

What is a question
Do you know what a question is?

You lie all the time

Dull, senseless,
pointless,
foolish, tedious, fake

Oh just grow up and quit choking on your own breath While
you’re still trying to breathe it in

Breathe slower
in out

Dull, senseless,
pointless,

Problems are so boring

PAUSE
PAUSE

A very important thing to know
Every spring
they refill the Erie Canal like it’s a giant bathtub
and then every fall
they drain all the water out.

Next year repeat
And repeat again
Just for the hell of it

Once upon a time just like all the other times
Once upon a time
At the fork in the road

I was thinking
Just so you know
Nothing

Nothing

Do you know what nothing is?

Nothing at all
The center of a big black hole
Nothing

Not knowledge

or
knowledge before knowledge

foreknowledge

Also
All the things you’ll
never ever
be able to do

And La de da de da
Did you look in the bushes?

Not there
Nothing interesting
Don’t look
what’s the point

The sky will fall
The sky is blue
The sun is bright yellow

Do, don’t, won’t, will

PAUSE
PAUSE

It’s very important to know that
Sometime
Somethings
should never be

But I can’t tell you
Because I’ve forgotten them all
Sorry
So Sorry

Hysterical

PAUSE

Soooo
Hysterical
But first

First things first
Get this straight
Know each other
Knowing each other
Having had knowledge of the other

Do you fully understand

It’s not under the rug
It’s not under the bed
It’s not in the bushes
It’s not behind the refrigerator
It’s not in the laundry
You should know where it is
You’ve been looking long enough

PAUSE

There are many things you should know
And I’m not going to tell you

PAUSE

It’s all common knowledge

Just guessing

Including
Because of

PAUSE

Don’t be greedy
Everything you’ve ever forgotten
and
everything you’ve always
wished
you could forget
Forget

How did you start your day?

I want you to know

That you’re dying right now
as you listen to me
Oh didn’t mean to bring that up again
That’s been discussed elsewhere
Sorry
How did you start your day?

You’re such a beautiful person for taking the time to listen to me.
I hope you learned all about all the important things
Important things to know.